I guess you can say im sober at the moment.
Though my road to recovery from my slight moment of utter misery
was indeed unusual when i think back about it.
It began on Saturday with the argument.
Around 2-3pm.
I cried on my computer chair
and tried to sleep.
But my mum and dad keep coming in and out in intervals of 15mins.
Then my brother came at about 4.45 pm
I had stopped crying but not without frequent tear drippings here and there.
My dad came in and asked me to go out.
Of course I refused and burst into tears.
Gosh it was traumatic.
Immediately jumped into bed - pretending to sleep.
Mum came in and poked my face which made me went -_- & T_T combined.
Slept until 6pm where my brother woke me up.
I love my brother. tHis is the reason why i respect him so much.
He woke me up..ask me to accompany him and his wife to Jp2.
At first i was reluctant but it was my brother after all.
So i decided to get out of bed, charge my ipod and bathe.
GOing out of my room , immediately seek out my cat.
Hugging him gives me an excuse not to look at my parents
which was what would made me cry that very instant.
Before heading out the door, my dad passed me $20 .
Which was unusual, becuase he NEVER GIVES Me money to shop
which i never did in the first place.
(id normally use my savings)
anyways, i wasnt in the mood to shop anyways and left in on my bedroom table.
At Jp2, walked around.
Almost suffocated due to the stiff air-conditioning at jp2.
(you know what i TAKE THAT BACK , I BET THE AIR CON WASNT EVEN ON.
it was so f-ing stuffy!).
My brother even sweated -.-
Throughout the journey, i was swollen-eyed
rid with a rebarbative headache and aches all over that doesnt seem to cease.
Reached home, immediately fell on my bed and guess what..
played with my cat = \
he was on the bed so i disturbed him a little.
Surprisingly, it made me happy.
I felt relieved in a way...
this is in addition to the trip beforehand.
I snickered when i saw my brother sweat xD
i mean..who would sweat in a Shopping mall =\
well the air-conditioning was bad anywyas = X
My dad woke me up...
around 9 pm to eat dinner.
Of course i didnt have any appetite.
THe next day,
i woke up at 5am. yes..5am.
Went to the kitchen,
grab a yakult and a packet of rice crackers
and guiltily ate a cone of ice-cream >_<
From then till 9am ive been
in and out of bed and facing the computer.
I felt tired but couldnt sleep
And when i couldnt sleep, i get bored.
WHen i get bored, i go to the computer.
When i go to the computer , i get tired.
When i get tired ,i go to bed.
THe cycle goes on and on..
THen my mum came in a NAG at me again.
Oh god..
Could'nt bear any more of her nagging i went to bathe.
Went back into my room and ..
slept..
but of course i COULDNT sleep..
so i just lay in bed and stare out of my window.
Which is great because the sun was up,
and the view outside was amazing : ).
I dont know if anyone experiences this,
but when i do nothing, i tend to deep think..
and talk in my head..
and think about stuffs..
Of course then i was in a slightly vulnerable state..
Then came back the guilt.Oh gosh.
I started crying again and again.
Then my mum said she going out.
After posting my "talk to me!! >_<" post.
I smsed Ina-chan, Farah and lee...
TO TALK TO ME >_<
Farah said she just woke up..
Lee said why?
sigh*
I told lee i felt so miserable i wanna die.
Lol she panicked xDD
Normally i tot she would think i was just using the "i wanna die" think as descriptive form?
eg; " WAH THIS TEACHER SO ANNOYING I WANNA DIE!" = \
get the meaning?
But of course, i meant otherwise =X
Lee's response was really unconventional xD
Beyond what i had predicted.
She asked me not to be sad..
I went.. -.-..
was expecting more actually.
Anyways making me go " - . - .... "
had me feeling part of myself return..
Since my singature expression was " -.-"
xD.
Soon after,i decided.
meh.. hopeless..
Rely on others to cheer me up.meh
wait so long -.-
so i ACTUALLY swallowed up my ego and went out to watch tv.
Soon...my journey to recovery began : )
And now i am as normal as ever.
Of course there was a stigma.
I dont think i can find myself trusting another adult i guess.
Neways, today went to my cousin's house.
Met dian <3 my beloved 'hafu' niece ( oi.. malay+ german lo! )
XD
I took like two vids..
but had problem uploading it.
ill upload it asap.
She is so adorable.
Met my uncle and aunt-in law
There was communication problem because
they only spoke german.
Though my cuzin-in-law , stefan translated.
Then my aunt-in-law ( oh crap i forgot to her for her name )
was cooking some german dish.
O---M---G...
it smelt sooooo nice : 3
and i havent eaten a single thing throughout the day.
( i went there at night you seE)
FOund out that MY uncle-in-law was born on the same day as my sister xDDD
Gonna go sleep now..
2morrow got dance..
Gonna grab a cheese cake and sleep.
Byez//
P.s TADAIMA!
Nami's back : )
Labels: Draft
<$I18NNumComments$>:
<$CommentPager$>
-
<$I18NCommentAuthorSaid$>
-
- <$BlogCommentDateTime$>
<$BlogCommentDeleteIcon$>
<$CommentPager$>
<$BlogCommentBody$>
<$BlogItemCreate$>
<$BlogItemFeedLinks$>
:
@ <$BlogBacklinkDateTime$>
<$BlogItemBacklinkCreate$>
<< Home